Rosalyn Engelman met her future husband, Irwin, in 1953 in the Bronx through mutual friends. He was 19 and she was 15. “I was hooked right away,” she says. “He looked like a movie star.”
The two went out for movies and milkshakes and talked until late into the night. Ms. Engelman knew right away that she was in love.
After three years of dating, Mr. and Mrs. Engelman married in November 1956. During their 70 years of marriage, they supported each other through their artistic and business careers, raised two children, welcomed a grandchild, moved from upstate New York to Connecticut, and traveled throughout Europe and Asia.
As they grew older, they supported each other through hardships such as cancer.
They currently live in Apsley, an assisted living facility in Manhattan.
According to Engelman, there is one ritual they have continued through the years. “We always say ‘I love you’ and kiss each other when we wake up in the morning and when we go to bed.” She doesn’t remember when this ritual started, but she knows it happened naturally and helped keep their love strong.
Expressing your romantic love for each other in words will make your relationship last longer.
Rosalyn en Courtney S. Warren
psychologist
“I think every act of kindness and love strengthens relationships,” she says. “I’m very lucky, because I don’t remember a time when our relationship wasn’t strong. We had our ups and downs, but it was external. It wasn’t caused by either of us.”
Mark Travers, a relationship psychologist, told CNBC Make It that the happiest people in love have rituals.
“Research shows that rituals can help couples organize their lives in a way that allows both change and stability to coexist,” he says. “Individuals can blend into a common identity that feels different from one or the other, uniting themselves no matter the turmoil around them.”
And it’s important to say “I love you” regularly. Psychologist Courtney S. Warren previously told Make It that “expressing your romantic love for each other in words can help your relationship last.” “And when you say it, make sure you really mean it.”
This part was not at all difficult for the Engelman family.
“We’re so happy to have each other,” Rosalyn says.
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