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Relying on parents for money leads to independence. But experts say it can also cause problems in relationships if not handled properly.
According to the 2026 Wells Fargo Money Survey, nearly two-thirds, or 64%, of parents of Gen Z children ages 18 to 28 say their children remain dependent on them for financial needs, including money, housing, and other support. More than half (56%) of these parents say support is putting a strain on their finances. The bank surveyed 3,773 U.S. adults late last year.
“Help through the mid-20s and sometimes even beyond is becoming more acceptable, especially when it helps young people finish school, manage housing costs, and avoid financial setbacks,” said Douglas Bonepers, a certified financial planner and president and founder of Born Fied Wealth, a wealth management firm in New York City.
But supporting parents should be approached “as a plan, not a lifestyle,” Bonepers said.
Know your parents’ support conditions
Support from parents comes in many forms, says Elena Van Stee, a sociology researcher at Harvard University who focuses on parent-child relationships. Parents may split costs such as rent with the child, or require the child to continue working while receiving assistance. Other examples include a parent selling their car to a child or charging them rent, she said.
“Especially in affluent families, when parents felt uncomfortable providing support, they sometimes developed creative ways to frame it in a way that felt more culturally acceptable,” Van Stee said.
In all cases, parents should be asked to “clarify” the terms of their contributions, said Vonepers, a member of CNBC’s Financial Advisors Council.
Specifically, he says he wants parents to explain in detail whether the aid is a gift or a loan. If your parents are giving you a loan, “treat it like an actual financial arrangement,” says Bonepers. You need to understand the total amount of the loan, the interest rate, when repayments start, the amount and frequency of repayments, he said.
Even if the support is a gift, people want to know how long it will last and when the situation will be reviewed, Bonepers said.
“A good rule of thumb is to review agreements monthly if support is ongoing and meaningful, and at least every three months if the situation is more stable.”
While these conversations can feel awkward, “ambiguity breeds resentment on both sides,” said Tim Lanzetta, co-founder and CEO of Next Generation Personal Finance.
To avoid future arguments, it’s best to put these financial arrangements in writing, added Corey Seemiller, a professor at Wright State University and co-author of “Gen Z: A Century in the Making.”
“For example, if parents agree to repay their child’s student loans, it should be in writing,” Seemiller said. “If your child is going to live in your home and pay rent, you should also put that in writing.”
“The finish line is visible to everyone”
Lanzetta said young people who receive financial support from their parents should also be upfront about their plans. “Parents should be able to show their budget and savings goals (and) a concrete schedule,” he says.
“This turns a never-ending situation into one where everyone can see the finish line,” Lanzetta said.
Vonepers said parents should come in for regular check-ins with their parents ready to share updates about their income, job search progress and debt repayments.
“The goal is to show that the support is being used purposefully and that there is progress towards greater independence,” he said.
“Past support enables present and future independence.”
Young people often feel embarrassed about receiving financial help from their parents, said Van Stee of Harvard University.
This support can cause anxiety about falling behind in traditional adult milestones, she said, or discomfort at the privilege of having access to this support when it is not available to many people. A 2021 study by researchers at the University at Buffalo and The New School found that the proportion of Black adults receiving parental assistance was much lower than that of white adults.
“Accepting parental support may feel at odds with America’s cultural understanding of meritocracy and the idea that people should achieve success on their own,” Van Stee said.
But in the end, she says, it’s often with the help of parents that children are able to stand on their own two feet.
“The support we have received thus far will enable us to become independent now and in the future,” Van Stee said.
