From the tight job market to the divisive politics to the general nature of the daily news, many Americans have good reason to feel stressed right now.
If you’re a parent, you may need to work a little harder than others to manage stress in a healthy way so that it doesn’t inadvertently affect your children, says developmental psychologist Aliza Pressman. This is especially true if you need to talk to your children about stressful current events. That way, your kids can hear about it from you in an intentional way, rather than hearing it elsewhere, she says.
“When the system is in fight-or-flight mode, you can’t parent effectively and you can’t build close, connected relationships. It just doesn’t work,” said Pressman, co-founder of the Mount Sinai Parenting Center and host of the podcast “Raising Good Humans.” “So it’s very helpful for all parents who aren’t actually at risk to tell themselves that they’re not at risk, so when they walk into the room to talk to their child, their child doesn’t panic.”
An August 2025 survey commissioned by the American Psychological Association found that nearly three-quarters of American adults are more stressed than ever about the future of their country. Research shows that parents can transmit their anxieties to their children through a process called emotional contagion.
“If a parent experiences nervous system dysregulation, the child will notice it over time. If it happens all the time, it becomes chronic,” Pressman says.
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Chronic stress and anxiety can impede a child’s ability to learn how to bounce back from failure and take the calculated risks necessary to become a successful and fulfilled adult, psychologists say. Many children also feel stressed by world events, from school shootings to climate change, and mental health experts say parents’ ability to discuss difficult topics when they arise can help children learn how to better manage their emotions.
Pressman recommends several steps to help manage anxiety and talk to your children about what’s going on in a way that helps them become more compassionate and resilient. If you are experiencing symptoms of clinical anxiety or depression, be sure to speak directly with your primary care mental health professional.
Manage your stress and listen first
Parents should not feel the need to force their children to discuss frightening events they may not have known about. But even when they’re not watching the news, Pressman points out that children often understand more than adults realize. They may hear snippets of information from school or older siblings, but what they hear can be scary or confusing, especially if the information they get isn’t complete or accurate.
Before sitting down to calmly discuss stressful news and events in the world with your kids, Pressman advises taking a moment to “check in with yourself, take a deep breath, and understand how you’re feeling.” She recommends practicing daily stress-relief habits, such as going for a walk, spending time with friends and family, meditating, or whatever works for you.
Pressman points out that reducing anxiety is not the same as ignoring real problems and crises. While problematic headlines may still be noteworthy, she says it’s healthy to differentiate between when you’re stuck in a relatively aimless cycle of anxiety and anger and where you can actually be helpful.
Next, start your conversations with your children by listening. If your child has heard about recent embarrassing events or if they seem more anxious than usual, ask them if there’s anything they’re worried about, Pressman advises.
“Start by making sure you ask what they heard and understand what they know, rather than telling them,” she says, adding, “You can correct the misinformation, and you can admit that it sounds scary.”
give hope
Structure the ensuing discussion based on your child’s age and maturity, says Pressman, and says, “There’s no need to lie or overshare details your child doesn’t want to hear.”
For younger children, it’s best to communicate simple, reassuring messages, she says. Teens and teens may be ready to deal with more complex situations and harsh realities. Older children may already have an opinion, so you should listen to it without dismissing it, says Pressman.
Some children may have many questions and concerns. Some people may seem to just go about their daily lives without worrying about anything. In any case, avoid talking about the topic for hours at a time, Pressman says.
“If it’s interfering with their daily life, that’s a red flag…” she says. “Once they’ve told you what they’re worried about, it doesn’t help anyone to sit down and discuss it with them for hours. You want to keep the conversation short so you can come back to it[later].”
Finally, balance honesty with realistic expectations. Pressman said it’s hardly honest to tell children there’s nothing to worry about. Instead, you can say you understand why they’re worried and you’re worried, too, but you’re also hopeful, she says. You can suggest ideas for how to take age-appropriate actions, such as volunteering or writing a letter to your elected officials.
“When we think about how we raise our children, we really want them to be inspired by good people around the world,” Pressman says. “If you turn that anxiety into something where you can actually affect change instead of just feeling terrible, everyone wins.”
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